2005-08-26 - 11:30 a.m.

It�s Friday

I think I should be excited about the weekend but in reality, it just gives me more time to think about how sad I am.

Last night, I went to O�Briens with some pals and to the �Ligers and Tigons and Beers, Oh My!� game which they kicked some booty at, and then back to the bar for a couple frosties. I was kind of down in the dumpers last night which is why I decided to get out of the house. I am glad I went but didn�t feel like my usuall jolly self. They all got about everything fried/breaded/dippable in ranch and it looked so yummy but I just had 3 fries which I am very proud of. I also only had about 4 beers so I was pretty pleased with that progress as well. I want to lose 2-ish pounds this week.

Tonight is my first time in 3 seasons to return to kickball. It�s Just a Game Focker, the team that I lovingly brought to life will kick off it's 8th season - Fall �05 at 8 PM if it doesn�t rain. Plus my Packers play at 7 so I should be able to watch the first quarter pre-kickball game. I am glad that my friends Cathy and Andy will be subbing tonight, they were very helpful through my divorce, as they and Kurt and I were together ALL the time. I know I can always count on them to support me.

I had a big knot in my tummy all morning as I knew I needed to talk to Jon to make arrangements to get some of my stuff that I need for camping next weekend. I was excited and nervous�kind of like you feel when you are going on a second or third or fiftieth date with someone that you really like. Once I talked to him (and estabilished that he hasn�t had any epiphanies in the last 72 hours and that he is also miserable), I felt worse. It made me cry and feel like puking which hasn�t gone away yet (could be a good way to lose some weight!). I excused myself from work so I could recompose myself and after a little drive and a chai latte, I feel at least like I can sit at my desk and do something�

God, I want to take a vacation. I was thinking of going to San Fran with my sister as she has a free room (convention) and I have a free ticket but I have to be in Cleveland for training on a system I sold that is being installed the same week. Boo hiss. I now have 2 floating holidays at my disposal. I think I will take them the week of Thanksgiving so I have something to look forward to between now and then, after all, it�s just 3 months away. Scary-that means Christmas is 4 months from yesterday.

I am very sad also that one of my favorite bloggers, Dansting is going to stop posting. He is one of the first blogs I had ever read and I have enjoyed his (sometimes mis-)adventures and hearing about his baby and brew drinking activities�Please post from home upon occasion, Dansting!

Ok, back to work. The skylight over my head renders me unable to see my computer screen and heats my keyboard up so that it burns my fingies from about 11:30 � 12 so it�s a good time to take my lunch

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